Bob’s Diary: My Answer to the Ogre.

I heard the Ogre thinks I am not bright, well check this out:

 

And it is only the begining, Doris thinks I will achieve new heights, with my artwork.

What do you think?

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Bob’s Diary: Rumor has it….

Bob: I’ve called a meeting because I’ve heard a rumour…

Ellie:  Seriously? What’s a meeting? What’s a rumor?

Bob: Just listen. We have a problem. The fact is I’m told the Ogre has a blog.

 Ellie: Good for him. He will be busy.

Bob: Exactly so we can find him and get a refill of fairy cakes.

“Good luck with that one.”

Bob’s Diary: Invitation to a party or two?

I was happier than happy to get one invitation to a party. An Ogre’s afternoon party, giant sized everything. Great.

But then I got another… to a fairies party. Brilliant, you can never eat too many fairy cakes.

Then I read them.

The problem is  they are being held on the same day, which one dare I refuse?

Help. Please. Suggestions would be appreciated.

Breeze: Mudpile Wood.

Tips for surviving enjoying your holiday in Mudpile Wood.

Leave your sunscreen at home (mud is used if sunscreen is needed), do bring the following:

1.            A really loud whistle, to help wake the Ogre at the gate, otherwise you may spend the entire trip camped outside the wood.

2.            Warm hats and gloves, (fingerless gloves are best in case you are trapped in a warlock’s tavern, you may have to pick a slippy, disgusting lock to escape.)

3.            Wellington Boots (but not red, as witches despise red boots, they tend to set them on fire.)

4.            Chocolate smelling deoderant. Everyone in Mudpile hates eating chocolate but they adore the smell.

5.            A clever friend who can solve puzzles in case Murphy the Leprechaun catches you, he will only release you when you solve his puzzle.

6.            Bring a lot of clothes  pegs. Hamish the resident Goblin adores his pet skunk. However, the skunk, Smelly doesn’t like living amongst, witches, elves, Ogres and Fairies and shows his displeasure by being … well… Smelly!

7.            Bring something unusual to eat. The residents adore eating and will try any new exotic food. By offering them an unusual tart or fruit you are gaining a friend.

8.            Don’t drive there. They hate cars and technology. Phones when discovered are smashed to pieces, computers have been sat on  and tablets, eaten.

9.            Bring loads of books. Ogres have an insatiable appetite. First they  read the book then they eat it.

10.          Last and not least, a sense of humour and some childish manners, it will help win you friends and erase any enemies.

For an image of Breeze (Ogre) inhabitant of Mudpile wood please check out this link to see The Trouble with Trees illustration.

How Breeze got his name.

“Breeze, its a weird name. How did you get it?” Tulip asked one afternoon.

He smiled. Flicking an annoying squirrel off the branch they sat on he said, “To answer that we need to climb Sugar Loaf mountain.” He pointed into the distance.

“Let’s go.” Tulip said.

One hour later they were sitting on a ledge looking down on the forest. “I can’t see our tree.” Breeze moaned.

“Let me help.” Tulip flicked her wand towards the trees. She said, “Wait, give it a minute.”

Breeze counted. At sixty he was rewarded. A rainbow volcano erupted from a tree, showering the forest below with sparkling, dancing lights. “Thanks,” he said and began his story.

Mum was nursing me outside our cave, the day after I was born. I was crying. Two birds flew close to her and asked her to make me stop. Then they asked, “What is his name?”

“He doesn’t have one yet, because an Ogre takes his name from whatever or whoever makes him smile, but he hasn’t stopped crying.”

“We know,” they said putting their wings over their heads.

A breeze blew softly across the mountain tops. It drifted down to the crying baby. It danced across his toes and worked its way up to his nose. His crying stopped. He smiled.

The birds popped their heads out and asked, “who did it?”

She said, ” the breeze did it. His name is Breeze.”

Tulip looked at him. “I don’t think that could be true.”

Suddenly she felt a flitting breeze tugging at her wings. It pulled her hair from its pony tail, tickled her nose. She smiled.

But Breeze was way ahead of her as it worked its magic on him and he laughed so hard he rolled half way down the mountain.

For an image of Breeze and Tulip check out this link