(Tips from a dog who survived Mudpile Wood.)
1. Look Happy.
Ogres’ love happy people and beings. Grumpy witches make them itch.
2. Sing soft lullabyes, Ogre’s love music and have a penchant for napping.
3. Smell of chocolate.
They love smelling chocolate but hate eating it. The downside of this is if you are a slow mover you may be caught and given a cuddle, which is tantamount to being squished.
4. Tell them you are Breeze’s seventh cousin. By the time they figure it out you will be long gone.
5. Offer them the book you are reading. They will read it first then eat it, giving you time to run away.
6. Admire their clothes. They are highly fashionable and will rush to the nearest mirror to try and see what they put on that is so stunning.
7. Bring a politician you don’t like with you, they can munch on them instead of you.